i can do it with a broken heart
by @scai
on the stage, basking in the sun,
a lover who was never chosen as the one.
holding the prizes i humbly flaunt,
but never got half of what i want.
shaking, repeating to myself, "i did well,"
hoping no one will be able to tell
how my eyes wander along a route,
looking for someone who already walked out.
you left me behind after making me feel won,
funny how you decided you were just done.
asked myself countless times where i went wrong—
i guess, in your company, i never belonged.
this smile hides all those sleepless nights,
a performance of standing, pretending i’m alright.
but babe, i actually did it, even without you,
now i know i should be fine to start anew.
thinking this gold i’m holding might call your eyes to me,
realizing it was also a competition of agony.
you were a prize, but i guess i want to deserve more—
there is no loss when i am a good score.
with a blood-stained face, i hold my head up high,
on this stage where people’s cheers dignify.
friends ask me how i do it while i'm tearing apart,
with bitter laugh, i say, "i can do it with a broken heart."