I wish I could've been a kid
a happy kid, a normal kid
a kid who was loved
not a kid who knew which parent was coming and if they were in a bad mood by their footsteps
a kid who played with toys
a kid who didn't slave away taking care of the house and their siblings
I wish my childhood were an actual childhood
I wish I didn't have to worry about getting beat
or screamed at
or not allowed to eat dinner
or made to swallow dish soap
I wish my unhealthy relationships weren't normal to me
I wish I knew what a healthy relationship looked like
I wish I didn't endure what I endured
it was too much for a little kid to carry
and it's too much for me to carry now