once there was a time i’d thought i could see the future so clearly.

running through sprinklers
washing off sidewalk chalk
bandaids on scraped knees
a story to say sweet dreams

it’s all i’ve ever wanted.
a place to pour this love —
that’s always making me turn blue

but there’s a part of me that always knew
i’d been selfish to have chosen you,
while you’d been blind to all that i am

now i'm only a toy on your shelf  
a broken doll with porcelain cracked
not entirely forgotten (yet) —
just smothered, drowning in the dust.


and for some reason,

i still try.