I hate that I can’t be around you
Under you
Or near
That you won’t love me
At all
That I can’t hear from you
A call or text
I’m bothered
And conflicted
I think what’s sad about this is that
No matter the people
The incentives
The kindness that others can offer
Why is it that I only have to want you
Why do I need to have you
Why can’t I get you out of my head
Why do I look at empty chairs wishing you were right in front of me
Why do I sit there and wonder what you would say in certain situations
Every day for 7 years I mourned you
I waited for you
Anything
A sign
Anything
I prayed to God and wondered why
Not you why can’t my heart let go of you
Here I am sitting and looking at another empty chair still trying come to peace with you not being here
I talk to god and ask him
What do I need to do
He says sit still
I hope this makes sense because my heart and mind are so confused