I recently met a nice ***** man who sleeps under a tarp beneath a bridge on interstate highway 95. His name is Tyrone and he has 14 children to 10 women. We shared a can of pinto beans as he told me about his interesting life: "I was born to a multi-billion-dollar family who founded Canada and three-quarters of modern America. Each morning our French maid {who was always naked} prepared luscious soul food that made our large penises harder than bauxite. I wanted to grow up quickly and make her have babies until she couldn't anymore. Her name was Fifi Alabama, and I loved her more than dogs love having themselves euthanized. She was a lovely woman with large knobs that could tell you how fast the wind was blowing when we were cruising on my dad's 300-million-dollar yacht. Anyway, she was in love with my cousin Jamaal who was of ***** descent. Fifi preferred ***** men because she was crazy. I often marveled at the way her labials sparkled in the moon-glow like a thousand nurses eating tuna fish on top of the Empire State Building during a hurricane and even if it takes 20 years, I'll possess Fifi's body and impregnate it a lot. Amen and so help me God and Merry Christmas."