For the evening I was just about to get ready so I could retire.
I had no idea that situations were escalating until they were dire.
The words that I write  to me they do not quite inspire
As I find myself climbing high just to get myself higher
Until I halt and catch ******* fire, get tangled up in  barbed wire
This chaos that constantly seems to ******* transpire
No wonder this self medication I tell myself I require
Sweet ******* release pretty much my only desire
The voice inside of my mind is nothing but a liar.
I am a ******* wire live live ******* wire that is watching the fire
As the demons lurk in the shadows and nefarious monster conspire
I am spinning just spinning like a ******* spin dryer
I have gotten myself into such a fantastic quagmire
That if  I were to take my aim I would probably misfire
A catastrophe and calamity ******* chaotic supplier
Of time and space I am simply a waste an occupier
Questioning minds they do so often seem to inquire
About all the pain and suffering I did somehow easily acquire
Flames such as these a pyro such as myself cannot help but admire
As up in smoke goes my world, so complete it engulfs entire.
In the darkest hours before I am thought to finally expire
I only long to hear the breath taking harmony of the angels choir

Not so much weighing on my mind but all of it heavy on my heart. My words barely Audible for my throat's so parched
Yet right through the Flames of my own Hell I slowly marched
As random on lookers just quietly to themselves they remarked
Some intentionally trying to stage a great *******  upstart
As lonely on this journey I myself am about to embark
Hidden away the the blackness of this soul ******* dark
Feeling as if at the very seems I am coming completely apart.
Heading towards the brightest parts of Hell in a hand cart
A beautifully broken disaster yet still a ******* work of art
Trying ultimate my night with fingertips that just don't spark
In general really at least for the ******* most part
Not feeling in the least bit confident, or even ******* smart
My own **** Demise I am feeling as if I did somehow jump start
I hope that joint you are not planning  to just ******* bogart
Please if you loved me at all get me ****** before I depart

A journey of such drastic ******* measures
Has me digging up all my cherished treasures
As hard pressing the very pressures
Put on me by the grievous endeavors
Leaving only those I consider my aggressors
To wallow in their own **** self pleasures
I am here attempting to burn out my own receptors
Truly it is a rather one of  those remarkable kind of gestures
As to Ashes I reduce all these unnecessarily kept records
I need no scythe to frighten off all these Spectors
Shaded by all these unseen ******* reflectors
So before I end property of some ******* collector
I'll seem out my very own salvation my own protector
That is in an entirely different world another sector,
Pretending all the while to be the courts best jester
Someone who let's the sorrows ******* fester.
Yet will never admit that they are indeed the lesser
A self doubling complete second guessed
That has been smashed underneath every stressor.
Now blowing in the breeze light as a feather
I am gone not just for now but for *******, ever.