I'm on the edge
so ready to fall forward
dump my body into the ocean
drowning yet not fighting
the currents motion.

Day to day life is chaotic
so many people who
push and pull me,
lie to me and fool me

I want to release it all
and jump off this carousel
living this way, as I do,
is hard as hell.

Inside I am broken
full of pain from youth
I feel I'm at a crossroad
where there's no left or right,
no honesty or truth.

The doctor says I am
just depressed is all
"Take two Zoloft and
if needed, in the morning,
give me a call."

I doubt a pill will cure me
when I no longer care to
reside in my own skin
I want to get away from
this dopamine hungry beast within

There's no more thrills
to be found
since she left me all alone
I'm a stranger in my own body
nothing feels like home.

People like me die all the time
what does it matter if I jump
or suffer to a ripe old age
the story is always the same
from page to page.