I admit, first night was hell...
and hell is not a place of screaming
and torture or fire
and crowd management panic
of a stampede...
it's a silence, a dealing eating silence
to suppose fish don't feel pain
with the exception of the fish
that are also mammals,
whales: who commit suicide by
beaching themselves...
that's not suicide Jonah?
When was the last time a whale
was invoked with such majesty-biblical
the former hellspawn of the depths
Yes what depths are to speak
of Mr. Psychologist if the whale
is a creature that requires a breath
it's not some lantershish
some abomination but a familiar beating
heart of mammalian unison...
hell is a silence... a deafening awe
that pairs scissors with knives...
mountains with former mountains
that are now deserts...
what used to be the great mountains
of Sahara... so much so that people
decided to revise what used to be
by spitting and ******* and *******
a birth of civilization via the concept
of life preserved eternal
in the great necropolis:
first night, just humming of the cctv
computer, that eight eyed ghoul...
i the ghost to boot...
impromptu: buy myself a radio....
patua spreschen...
in the 12h from 7pm to 7am
there is so much you can do...
with sugar and caffeine
and I started smoking again to double up
on what caffeine misses...
reading Dune with enough time
apart from seeing the movie
to appreciate the words...
backgammon and the banality of
games of fate, chance, imagine chess
being orientated around the luck, the draw,
die...
reaching out to loved ones, esp one,
magnetic girl: dried pasta muncher
as I wonder: pebble dust if she
switched to a diet of swallowing metal
knots...
I am mentally drained and finally
reaching a worker-ant crescendo
of being numbed into a dissociation
von-sein-da (from-being-there) or hier:
heir to "a" here: problem solving
Athens and the Germanic black root
of humor and full moons
Arbeit arbeit macht not so frail...
Tiredness and the contingency plan
of thinking about endurance sports...
like walking marathon lengths of distance
is easier than standing as pilgrim
in the fort of pillar for the same amount of time:
if not double that...
only today I wept at the sun
then talked
then laughed
then became mad spontaneously
and only for a short while...
besides the capacity to have
to eat for the reassurance of stamina...
there's only so much you can do
within the confines of the night on
a 12h ball breaker...
I get bouts of insatiable need to
******* to ease off the pressure
on my shoulders, Promethium Atlas
rereading of the vicinity...
but! if I treat writing this dribble-scribble
like others might relax when
solving a crossword puzzle...
8 cameras and I try to be professional
about it, namely: to be present
but also with the alias: invisible:
gently nudging reality into motion
beginning from the shadow-front...
then I wait for the hour of radio
transmission from 12am onwards
where advertisers give up churning
milk into the butter to dough of
attention spans willing to shpend
shpend shpend.... seriously?
Pedantic of me: if Liszt the Z is a surd
like in thought you can write
(th)ou(gh)t...
I ought I not note oughts and noughts...
primo: th is
what conjecture is relating
theta to eta...in Greek...
This third night and I'm in my element
I am finally orientated
to the compactness of scrutiny of space
and the hyperbolic concept of time-fluctuations:
minutes are meaningful...
hours are meaningless...
days are organic...
weeks and perhaps...
months don't exist...
years I pardon with the gravitas of
a meaning that's inorganic...
time is a special creature
while space with all the universe
so... oh so *******... un- -spec- -tac-
-ular! Ursuline girls would know...
Tis my first night of writing while
on the "job" and how gratifying
the similtude of being ambidextrous
schizoid bilingual of mind..
Schubert first... people should seriously
switch off their t.v. sets and get into
the kink of listening
to classical music radio station at night...
the **** and geese flying?
Solo goose... sorry missed that
Bad WiFi in Lebanon?
Walkie Talkies exploding because
Zee Chimney ChooChoos said so?
Mount my ******* Orion to Zion cannon
of trajectory?
This **** had been happening
since that eventful day I was flying
back from Kauai, last year, 7th October,
2000... 23...
wow... only 15 minutes past 11pm
And I have 8 hours to conjure up
a human with abrupt allowances
of deviating from the magic of:
making inanimate objects animate!