just thinking about the (use of the) English language
among the Wanstead crowd...
those hipsters and familial ******* jockstraps
of pride:
whereby, also, single women, puppy mumma's
carry their poodles around with wry smiles
of self-awareness that doesn't translate into self-assurance
these holistic pop up site
these tappings on the forehead as if to prompt
the awakening of the bindi or buddha's third, mind-eye...
just one: considering Islam: allah has two mind eyes...
which makes him a Jewish joke
like myopia is Allah the four eyed quadratic
like i have letters in my name:
two rugby posts: H H...
and Y the serpent's tongue
and the W or the wave of time...
what my woman can't: simply can't... understand...
as a Catholic and not as a Catholic:
i can't be subordinate to Christ...
for all his staged suffering i am a stoic
in understanding all the suffering that happens
in the world in silence and in darkness
and in isolation:
this proselyte messiah or the messiah
of the proselytes:
how we would all become magical mushroom
Jews: Hebrews!
this pagan soul is intellectual...
i am a pagan intellectual: i'm curious about
the world, about language:
i don't need! a ******* iron maiden crucifix
pose to settle the score with:
with god i can settle the matter on affairs of
words and letters...
so... e.g. the tetragrammaton and the allah
contender immediately settled...
two of my poems saw absolution:
saw the compedium the final banality of what
life is was and was not to be...
i saw time as a fraction in light:
because time... oh time is so unlike light:
the stars...
time is the indivisible the incalcuble:
i do not dwarf under the weight of an ever
expanding universe, space doesn't bother me:
but time?
light and the stars are equivalent
to 0.000000000000001 meaning of time...
rough estimate...
put enough zeros behind and put enough
zeros in the mirror of creation and hey presto!
satan's clause and mickey mouse!

palm sunday meets rosemary twig Monday...
have to start smelling like a ***** Monsestary bound
European...
i never wanted women like some men
i wanted...
i didn't want anything...
i was just thinking about language...
definite articles...
did you... know...
that nothing is a pronoun, it is also a pronoun...
***? non-existent...
i am just realising:
i might not be a racial minority in London
(questionable):
but i'm certainly an ethnic minority:
i'm an anglo-Slav like borrowing from
the Anglo-Saxons who treated the Welsh
and the Scots and the Irish so poorly:
why the Welsh Irish and Scots treated
the Romans and the Romans in turn treated
them
as the modern Afghans of the way way
way ahead of you...
the definite article: the...

        ðeh         þought:

so these women these nuns think, still! still think!
"think": that he died as the sacrificial totem
akin to the chemistry associated with preserving
biology: from mummies
to taxidermy... taxidormy... i'm writing
and i'm not getting red line underlining prompt
to correct my spelling:
as i told Alex:
you know what really bothers me about America?
they treat Catholics with the same suspicions
as Muslims...
but they have these new age churches
with pastors dressed in Hawaiian shirts
and they're dyslexic...
what's wrong with dyslexics?
i'll tell you: for centuries there was a monopoly
on literacy and we had a priestly class
and a warrior class
and the masses were illiterate:
as we the warrior class:
but the priestly class were the gatekeepers
of literacy...
and look what happened! under Christianity:
and Islam followed suite:
and Jews remained: rats: basically Jews:
i identify as an urban rat... urban fox...

two syllable surnames, ha ha:
HIT-LER
STA-LIN
FRAN-CO
Mussolini doesn't ******* count
the courtesan the dear bongo bongo
apparently a Gad o Sad
described Italian men as the ideal lovers:
drama courtesans...
i can't imagine myself
being filled with the purpose of
chasing women...
El-ert...

           o.k. o.k. language...
indefinite article A
indefinite negation article: NO
definite article THE
definite negation article: NOT

so among the knots of no there emerges the NOT
to shun all No...
i'm having trouble dissociating
the positive: the anti-negation articulation
into bullet of: a no the not...

yes... the s bothers me: since
there's also the plural article s
and the possessive article 's... no?
so we came to this Wanstead "festival" like
marounding pirates:
a scouser an anglo-slav...
a pakistani and an india
and two mixed race prototypes...
the pirates have landed...
the children noticed us...
oh my... i never thought i would see
that side of Lyndon:
he had a bollocking about call signs and Disney
and waffles
but then he did what
Mark Leggit would have done
by touching the child, lifting the child:
trying to play father:
which prompted the women
to ask for his identification
because:
i never thought i would see
a man become: as the women put it:
get... clucky...

do i wish to have children?
wouldn't a partner equivalent to the age
of my mother and a teenage daughter
i could have given ***** to: suffice?
don't know...
           maybe i'm not supposed to...
i can appreciate the fact that my observations
are precious and precarious enough
to be held withstanding the desires
and the needs for having a woman
and children in my life with
biological knots: of no nots...

how the **** do you distinguish saying
yes once from saying yes
a number o' times (apostrophe F)
intelligent? are we?
let's test you:
on the rack of dog ownership:
i own cats: they're not social events sort
of animals...
remind me... i'm tapping my fingers...

in my youth i was so gsagging to travel
to India... joke being?!
India came to me! ha ha!
me ******* off to Kauiai with dyslexic
pastors
and who should the current priesthood be?
the ******* algorithm and AI writers...
this is the new religion
these are the new literacy barons...
they just need a pope a St Peter
maybe a St Matthew to give them focus
concerning: how much ******* power,
power: they have:
there is no longer will to re-establish the power
already governing the people!
there is a new "dyslexia"!
i'm part of it!
      i'm illiterate in the domain of coding:
coding is the new literacy:
but i'm watching all these children and i'm...

backgammaon!
it's a game of strategy at first...
less strict than chess...
but enough time passes
and backgammon
becomes
a desert queen of: just strip baby: just strip...
there's a banality in the game
when all chance-tactic-non
equaluates itself:
like there's the existence of a game
and there's a yawn because
there's a revisionist yawn of consciousness
of: we were... playing a game... weren't we?
oh... so you're right: mr. wellyard...
commotion in the bar? none:
i just looked the part
and kept a stern face and sunglasses
on when the kiddy teenage girls noticed
i was still wearing a friendship bracelet
form a Taylor Swift gig (anti-hero:
ugh... now my favorite song)...
i just thought one word... now maybe two or three:
now... comes the sweetness...
teenage girls in provocative attire of knee high socks...

but language though...
so a: indefinite article
the: definite article...
no: indeinite negation
not: definite negation...

      it's not so easy with the definite
and indefinite affirmation to counter negation...
i already said:
time and light and what passes:
light is a fraction of the concept of time...
time is like light:
physics is the study of the potential of energy
chemistry is the study of the potential of substance...
biology is the study of the potential of consruct...

one ******* hippy festival
in a crux of geopolitical affairs
and all the ginger **** purple haired dog ladies
start going mad
like i put on this fat facade face of concrete
because i've been standing on my feet for 10h
and had only a 30min break and bad chicken...

oh my, oh my... i'm going to get so
much reading done on my shifts at the Elephant &
Castle... just 1h away...
i'll finish Knausgaard's vol 6...
           and say goodbye to Joseph, my grandpa...
i think that's when i will break into tears
and give the homeless a nightclub esque...
no no...
but i will certainly cycle on my: prized possession
of a Bias... Basis... Basis...
tourmalet...
                 and think more about the popish
and the priestly: neu-klass...
             if no one is daring to address the concept
of revising literacy...
then we'll be left with barbaric grafitti giraffes to
show for it...
it only takes a miner and a grave-digger
to suss out the middle-class and ask for Buddha...
because Christ is for Kings
and not the paupers... ha ha!
Christ is the god of kings and not some petty...
drama queen Sri Lankans and Puerto Ricans!
Christ is not the god of the paupers
he's the god of kings!
i can't have Christ in my life!
the ****** had a father for a carpenter
and a mother who lied about being an adulterous *****!

ha ha!         just that... Islam makes so much
more nugget: of sense in me!

seriously?! we're going to have this: "conversation"?
the imbeciles... new literacy was spawned
and we're still just: scribbling terrible rhyming
work load ethics of words just being used?
just... being used?
and what are the remnants of the old
priestly caste?
before the death of god: or maybe after:
i see something more wonderous than
the death of god:
i am witnessing a death of belief:
or rather:
i see belief being woven into tectonic pressures
of having to become evolutionary
viable: to be preserved:
not for any specific dogma: of a people: for a people:
but for the ultimate scrutiny of existence:
that existence as an experience
that can be reciprocated with the acknowledgement
of man: can be: and will be: preserved.

p.s.

i think, the only way to utter...
the definite articulation of anti-negation:
plural ye as in yeS...
in the most affirmative-idefitiness is
via the existenial brackets "/"
ergo: via: yes is the definite-affirmative-article
while aye... ultimately: yourself (reflexively)
your self (reflectively)... is
the only i: of the indefinite-affirmative articulation:
and article... not a pronoun.