I am pretty **** sure that my very sense of reality has been quite fractured right now I'm feeling like any moment now I'll end up being captured thanks to that ******* stitching little ******* I don't know how I should continue do I  run or just sit here and get ******* plastered just in case you didn't ******* know there's a hole inside of my very ******* soul that nothing and no one ever seem to fill I promise that I am ******* nothing if I'm not at least real very seldomly do I ever show what I feel everything surrounding me feel so **** surreal there is in fact something that is bound up inside of me right now but it's just sort of sitting here being still depending on how bad the break is in my mentality will prove if  my feelings are actually going to end up in a fatality.
for whatever reason it is I just do not ******* know whatever it is that is hurting me I just cannot seem to let it go
well aware that if I do I will completely lose control I'm more than a little bit demented and perverse I have a feeling that before things start to get better they're going to end up getting so much ******* worse I  cannot ******* help it
I feel like I am under some sort of curse even though it feels like I am the only person half *** awake in my part of universe the ghost I got for heroes once traded soon I will disperse   getting rid of them first for my demons drink of my misfortune they quench their thirst any moment now whatever is beginning to savagely build till out of my ******* chest this nefarious monster could soon burst
ever since my mom rocked me in my cradle I've known for sure but I wasn't anywhere close to being ******* stable I do  know that losing my temper while  unstable that my emotions would prove to be fatal not wishing to create just another meaningless label
I am in fact brutally ******* able to live comfortably with all these monsters residing inside of me or will I exist only to be in misery
It becomes quite clear to me that I have pondered such a question so  sincerely
all of this chaos has created a distorted version of who I am meant to ******* I've become  nefariously notorious and outlaw in my minds  eye I'm in need of an ironclad alibi
a collaboration of some story  fabricated and probably an outright lie something way more elaborate simply saying that I was out somewhere getting ******* high higher than a **** kite I am tonight there is no doubt in my head that my eyes just aren't quite right everything fades to black
when the road I'm on turns black I am blinded by the light so blind in  running off the road into to a place I've never seen before lost inside with these words I write
may I say that I end up trying to do my dead level best with all my might there's no one else that appears to be out there that in reality
is still here
I throw myself off  with the end in coming closer as it grows near  bits of my are starting  to just disappear how much more can I really take
How much longer before  ai stop bending and I actually break coughing with everything ******* deep breath I take
Feeling counterfeit like I'm a ******* fake shedding this feeling like shedded skin from a snake
I end up beginning to ******* choke
I'm losing the cause for I've been  completely broke
must be a ******* comedian because my life is a twisted ******* joke I am a hoax a  permanent ghost of some spirit I once attempted to invoke but instead that Spirit ended up being a demon that I did unknowingly provoke half *** woke I went into a dream Just as I thought someone had spoke.  Puff pass I **** who's that bloke in a hood with a scythe trying to act like regular folk.  I guess this could be a never ending night terror a nightmare to which no horror could conceivably compare I am sinking in the depths of my despair
I am just   about gone but gone to where *** and sweat perfume the air the dead don't see they just seemingly stare. Spill my secrets in this darkness I will not dare.
I am going, I'm going, going, gone down another rabbit hole impossible to console taking little comfort in twisting this bowl so incomplete I'll never feel whole. So much colder and more corrupt I become the older I grow.  See you later in the places even my Angels fear to go.