The tendrils creep up slowly
Icy cold wraps up smooth thighs first
Sinking into the pit of my stomach
The dregs of anxiety unwavering

"You'll always be alone."

Don't I know it? I tell myself,
Fighting off the fear again and again
The clutching cold at my throat
Vines of breathlessness encroaching
On my ability to live
This ******* rock on my chest has to let up

"You'll never be good enough."

I know that too, that's why
I continue to fight, continue to learn
Continue to make mistakes and repeat
Them just in case.

I ******* know. I know my faults. I know my hangups. I know.