FACT.
I "don't believe" in astrology.
FACT.
I am a drag queen.
FACT.
In utero I donated the left side of my brain to Steve Jobs.
I felt he had great potential.
You're welcome, Steve.
FACT.
Everything has a voice and a silly sound effect.
FACT.
Your negative attitude is poisoning the village water supply.
FACT.
New people scare me.
FACT.
Old people scare me more.
I just don't think I'd make a very good one.
FACT.
I want a small army of children.
I just never want one of those little aliens inside of me.
FACT.
You like me more now that I'm not who you told me to be.
FACT.
All of our favorite things should be memories masquerading as gifts and hand me downs.
FACT.
My thoughts like to fight each other with wooden swords.
"Knock it off! I'm on the telephone."
FACT.
My mother used to be a hummingbird.
I know this because of the speed at which she blinks when she's angry.
FACT.
He gave her a unicorn.
FACT.
I choose always to never believe what they tell me.
FACT.
You can't find the answers to your problems in a smart phone.
"Are you listening to me?"
FACT.
When I think about how many adults never stop letting others make their decisions for them.
It makes.
Me want.
To weep.
FACT.
A stranger can't see everything that makes you beautiful.
But it's as clear to me as neon.
Wrapped in glitter.
FACT.
There are never enough hours in the day.
"When's dinner?"
FACT.
You think.
You can't.
FACT.
You know.
You can.
FACT.
You'll never live in the now tomorrow.