Trust is a tricky thing.
One person in your life can shake the ground you walk on forever without a second thought.
Your own anxieties bring insecurities that make you lose trust in people. It's not always their fault, but when those sneaking feelings end up being true, goddamn it takes so much to come back from that.
Distrust and uncertainty seep into everything moving forward. You can't help but compare and see similarities. Screw the glaring and incredible differences, you will still find ways to not trust him. It's not fair to him, but you feel jaded like it doesn't matter anyway. Continue building those walls and slamming more bricks up there each and every time you have a concern, warranted or not.
You'll push everyone away because you will never be able to let go of those parts of yourself.
-t.s.