I never thought I'd go back to smoking
But there's not much to do here
Besides stoke the fire.

I spent a year watching it all crumble
So I tucked my tail between my legs
And went home humble

I wonder around trying to stay busy
There's so much that needs done
But I'm so ******* lazy

I thought I had conquered my many addictions
The shadow of my past haunts me
Causing these afflictions

I've been in a panic, knowing I'm undeserving
Happiness and success aren't for me
The pressure is unnerving

I can't handle drugs like I used to
My palpitations make me anxious, but
What else can I do?

I gave it my best, and tasted the good life
My art has been seen by so many
But I was stifled

Now I'm just bored, so **** it I'm smoking
The feeling of nicotine is
better than nothing