Constantly feel trapped in my own private hell.

I remain in my own empty box.

Wish I could just walk, read and speak better.

Break the dark spell on my life feel happy and more free again.

One side of my body always feels lifeless,
I feel out of breath
really tired.

My brain on the other hand  
feels much more speedy and wired.

Got loads of ideas but can't seem to always keep them going in my mind for long enough and end up forgetting them.  

Things I really need to complete in my day but can only usually attempt to do a few things so feel like I fall way behind every one else.

Events I really want to attend and friends I want to see again which I feel like such an huge let down and usually have to cancel them in the end.

My body will not always work for me in the same way as my brain really does.

Instead my body  just wants to not do anything that my brain tells it to to do just  give up so easy in the fight when its needed the most.

I find I can't often move my legs and arms when I want to move them.

One of my eyes  doesn't work as well so I can't always see too good.

My thoughts are jumbled up in my mind so dont make much sense.

My speech is a lot harder to understand.

I feel like the  messy splat on the page that is  really trying to blend in and look dignified, beautiful and still but it's really nothing more than just a plain, chaotic, messy splat that doesn't belong there in the first place.

No matter how hard life can be though its always good to have a sense of humour and just  never give up when it gets really tough.