I could kiss your forehead
like you do to me
but I'd be confirming something
that isn't true
some kind of fallacy
an if:then statement
that seems simpler than it is
I keep myself at a distance that should be comfortable
close enough to touch you
but not close enough to mean anything
your fingers are stained by another
and mine are clean
manicured
pristine
but I cling to you
fingers tracing circles along your body
nails digging into your skin
and maybe you're tainting me
infecting me with your sickness
plagued by you
by something that exists without a cure
so I will have to endure
something I should be adept at by now
but you keep finding new ways to inflict pain on me
something with which I will have to make do
I want you to hate me
I think I need it
there's not another way I can see myself getting though this
hurt me and I'll hurt you
and I'll keep hurting you to the point of no return