And if I failed to breathe, you would mourn me
And if I failed to marry, you would scorn me
And if I reproduced, you would detest me
And if I ceased to move, you would arrest me

And if I quit my job, you would disown me
And if I made my music, you would ignore me
And if I made more money, you would shame me
And if I made no money, you could blame me

And if I met my maker, you would maim me
And if I met your maker, you would claim me
And if I made you, you would forsake me
And if I was made by you, you would shake me

And if I stayed in bed, you would kick me
And if I flew the coop, you would miss me
And if I were me, you would disguise me
And if I were you, you’d still despise me