I have this love and hate relationship with my homeland
Always felt ashamed of the passport I’m holding
Hiding at right away
After airport check in
So no one can see
Bc that’s not the person I wanted to be
Never felt free in here
Never felt this place suits me
Every time coming back
I have this fear
That I will stuck
And won’t get out
From here
Perhaps I would love this place a little more
If we had borders opened with Europe
Or even better no boarders at all
If not the Russian influence
If we had national identity a little more
Oh god I’m so tired of repeating it
That no, my country is not a part of Russia
No we have our own history separate from them
And our own language
But I don’t even know it properly
Bc these jerks from the East of us did everything to eliminate it
(If I only could I would cut out Russian language out of my memory forever
And replace it with something else)
But at least I’m half Ukrainian
Which makes me a little bit more proud of my blood
Bc unlike these country residents they’ve got *****
And they do not have this national identity crisis
I’ve been raised up without family values
Even more I’ve been raised up without no values at all
I mean there were people who tried to put some values in me
But they couldn’t make it
Sometimes I envy those who’ve got some values
At least it makes some sense for their living
While I’m just keeping my existence senseless
And I turned out to be the saddest adult after all
Well if you can call an adult this infantile creature
It seems like I went too far
So what I wanted to say is
It seems like I pity my country out of love
But I don’t want to identify with it
Or be somehow connected
Oh god let’s us be the creators of our own destiny