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Sep 2013
I stand alone
Frozen, frightened, without power
Can I stay the course for one more day?
Perhaps one more hour?

This pain is gripping
Can I make it one more day?
The loneliness is crushing
My familiar habits could take all that away

Forty-three years I've been like this
Never jailed nor hospitalized
All this time, I've managed to get by
But for a wounded soul and tearful eyes

Too proud to ask for help
Too weak to make it without
Can I stay the course for one more day?
Will I be beaten by fear and doubt?

Maybe I can slip across the line
Maybe just for a day
I know that's a lie
Perhaps I can convince myself anyway

Every moment that goes by
I miss her warm seductive gaze
Couldn't we dance one more time
For an hour or a couple of days?

I know that won't work
This sickness she can't heal
Perhaps peace lies only
Is in the taste of the gunsmith's steel

I've been to a meeting
Actually four
There, I saw something else
Do those people have something more?

These people who meet
These people who share
How could they help me?
Why should they care?

To them … I'm a stranger
To me … I'm a shame
So why the warm embrace?
Why do they even remember my name?

They talk of a Higher Power
Can such a thing be?
But the question is moot
He would never want me

I fell wounded to my knees
A prayer slipped out
My vision a bit clearer
Less blurred by fear and doubt

If I ask for more
Will He grant it to me?
Maybe wisdom and courage
Perhaps acceptance and serenity

But if God is just
I should be punished without end
Instead ... a glimmer of hope
Instead ... a way to begin

Now, could I tell this in the rooms?
No, that's too naked - too daring
But maybe I'm wrong
Perhaps this is the stuff of sharing
Andrew Monroe
Written by
Andrew Monroe
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