sometimes i look back at old photographs
at the friends i no longer speak to
at the clothes that have been lost to time
at the places that felt so alive and vibrant
how i can still smell the air and hear the sounds around me of music playing and friends laughing
i look back sometimes at old photographs
and i feel as if i’m looking at a stranger
that was so creative and had so many beautiful words to say
i look back and i feel the shame of not realizing i could’ve done better, treated others better
treated myself better
i look back and i wish i had not taken for granted
the energy i had and the simple moments
that i now find myself struggling with
i want to go back and tell her
“enjoy this night because it will be the last time you body will be able to endure this”