Soft heart like her,
A bleeding heart,
fingertips stained red with sweetness,
with Woman,
with Eternity.
Root. Seed. Fruit.
Her hands extending to mine.
Through ethers and
In dreams.
In dreams
I’m chasing
her light,
her love.
Protector of the heart,
Stewardess of the dream world,
Please slow my pace
and drive me deeper.
Help me to cry
and be softer.
Slow the rate the pain permeates me.
My heart is tired of
tender swelling.
Wants to be held in the holiness
Of being alive.
Let me take the pain in pieces.
Give me space to digest my place in it all.
Let me dream with her magic again,
rather than of the sickness.
Let me hold her,
Be held by her.
Drive her deeper.
Let it all penetrate me,
but slowly please.
Imprint it,
Brand it into my bones,
make me made from it -
the love, the strength, the beauty.
I want to be built of soft systems.
I wait, I beg, I work for the day we no longer have to be so resilient.
Let me taste, small
the sweetness.
Inhale her existence.
Exchange each other -
I will give her praise and vow to listen.
To find the silent spaces
she Exists.
Where I can bow to her presence
and no longer her memory.