I look  up
and then around me
society says" EW look at her
shes a witch
shes a freak
shes a creep
look at the way she taps her hands
walks barefoot on the ground
is a neurodivergent
artist
is lazy,
you must return
to the hustle culture
you must stop with your nonsense
with your feminism
with your dreaming etc...
with your believing in magic and spirituality.

My whole life
everyone laughed at me
mocked me for being myself ,
my parents ,my brothers and pretty much everyone
I've been so misunderstood
that I haven't even understood
myself
or the friends that I had,
looking back,not really sure
that they were my friends.
If and when I was truly myself .

I remember in my past lives
when I was also a witch
I was beaten tortured
and drowned,
just for being a women/ a witch
when they talk about  the patriarchy
this is it ,
I am still a witch in this lifetime  
althought there isn't outright opression
like it was back then,
I still find it a struggle
because I've never ever
fit in and when I tried
it felt like a taste from  the burning hell,

I wish that society was more accepting and understanding
of different types of human beings.
I certeinly strive to be.
I don't know if this is a poem
or an essay
I don't really know what is it
to be honest with you ,  
All I know is that,
I am really trying to do the work in healing myself
and understanding
that where there is a will
there is a way,
everyone has a different purpose
and this is part of mine.