Every time I think I’m getting better
I have those thoughts crawl up
And tear me apart
Reminding me of how horrible I could be
Because I feel as though my recovery isn’t good enough
And it’ll never be good enough
One slip up and I hate myself
And I feel as though I’ve failed myself
As well as those around me
Why is nothing ever forever
Can”t recovery last over time
Having slip ups isn’t fair at all on me
I just want to recover completely and be the person I’m striving to be already
They say time heals all wounds
But for me my time creates wounds
Because that time is spent bottling things up
Until my head explodes and I black out
And I ruin good things
And fail myself
I just wish to be healed
And better
Why do I self sabotage
And why do I never feel good enough
Will time heal me
Or will it destroy me
Like it did before