I always seem to go through stages of sadness
One situation leads to multiple crashes
Splashes of disasters
Walls closing in
No air
Too far to swim
I know they never last
But always come back
They take hold of my life
And tonight
I shut the world out
Forgive me for what I may blurt out
I can say I'm not happy
That my life is ******
I can take what I've learned
And grow from it, I am sure
I don't really know what else to say
My feelings are spinning today
Hit fast forward
Don't need a replay
I need to get away
To a place
That appreciates who I am
My friends all know me as the brave one
What's so brave about telling the world you're the gay one
My family doesn't understand me
I can never make them happy
We barley agree on what to eat for dinner
Let alone whether I have the right to marry
I feel very alone
Have lots of friends by my side
But sometimes I don't want to be alive
I'll throw my phone at the wall
Contemplate who I am
If you saw inside me maybe you'd understand
But until then
I'll express myself the best way I know how
And for now
I'll stare at my ceiling
Until I fall fast asleep and dream about a perfect place for you and me
My alarm will go off
I will be alive
No suicide
I'll just prioritize
Until I am finally happy