i think she still appreciates the fact that i'm visiting her in
the brothel after a "gruelling" shift...
that i still have the energy to come to her for:
i figured it out! finally! a way to avoid any erectile dysfunction
without a quick-and-easy fix...
******* for four days prior to actual interacoure:
without climaxing: that's called channeling the ******...
unlike the medieval medicinal practices of draining
blood via leeches...
tiredness also helps to stimulate the member...
and? no hard alcohol... glory-laps around the park
at Goodmayes... and via Huxley Drive...
drink 75cl of 7.2% cider...
when take three glorious sips of whiskey
drowned in Pepsi chaser...
right... the nerves aside... now i can focus on slapping
that glorious fat *** of hers...
oh... so that's why i climaxed so early last time?
i almost forgot... she most certainly forgot...
she was groaning more when performing oral *** today...
why? i noticed she forgot that: even as an uncircumcised
male... i built up a tactic of folding back the *******
exposing an imitation circumcision phallus...
it makes me last longer...
see... that's why i don't see the point of circumcision...
and all that circumcision dictates in the realm
of monotheistic religions...
a man gets circumcised: he starts waving his hands
about like a mad seagull!
a man circumcised ergo: a woman needs
to don a niqab... a man has do don a kippah...
a man has to grow a long beard...
a man needs tonsure curls...
there's need to Halal... there's need for Kosher salt...
me? nice and easy... i just peel the ******* back
and hey presto! i can peform for much longer:
mind you... for a woman's mouth? aesthetically?
an imitation of a circumcised ***** is...
well... let's just say that the first time i had *** with
Michaela i forgot that she had an orange in her hand...
an orange she ate with the zest... hence my "premature" /
too quick a "performance"...

hmm... i always thought of myself as some archetypical
closure for what a werewolf ought to behave like...
i had a decent affinity toward dogs... foxes... cats...
i come across a clever little satan-black rooftop mongrel
crossing my math: i chance a little petting of the little critter...
but it turns out i'm more vampiric in nature...
**** me: who am i *******? Transylvanian girls...
goddesses with raven hair...
in whatever shape and sizes... perhaps i'm both...
depends on which part of me feels like being
more eloquent than brute on a given day...

she's going away to Romania for a month...
i promised her that i'd see her before she left on the 28th...
i came today... i have another shift on the 18th...
West Ham... much closer...
i think i'll have to give her a little parting present...
that ****** little book of poetry i published on my own...
sign it: farewell! i've already given on to a Turkish girl...
time for Romania...

kisses... more kisses... now the tongues met...
from her opening of oral to sitting on top of me...
to the missionary...
        my god... it's not like i wasted my 20s on having
too much ***: it's like i actually did go mad
with god and now, that i'm in my masculine prime
of the age of 36... i'm finally earning enough money
to spend it on the only worth spending money on...
*** with women: no... not dates with women...
*** with women: women who enjoy having ***...
i enjoy having ***... like i enjoy petting dogs
and petting cats... the same chemicals are released into
my body... these three creatures lie side by side
in my psyche...
i enjoy a woman enjoy herself...
i like seeing her do a little dance... smile... giggle...
it's just a beautiful "thing" to watch...
esp. if her body-type has been undermined:
while you wonder at all her imperfections...
a bit of fat here... a bit of fat there...
you know you're "in" when she likes it when you slap
and pinch her *** and other places...

**** it: this is clarifying for me: it's a remedy for me...
this is therapy-scribbling at its finest...
when i was a colt... night-clubs... drinking...
always the same story...
i'd finish the night off with screaming into the night
because i was alone: i didn't manage to land a "chick"...
now? with the aid of earning money...
i finish a glorious shift at work...
i lost count with regards to how many palms
and hands and wrists of women i touched today...
i got to the brothel...
obviously i first have my walkabout with a bottle
of cider and three glugs of whiskey to relax...
i go... mind you: i figured something even better:
why? why spend money for an hour...
when you can be done in 30 minutes?
on top of that... you can have more 30 minutes
sessions than wasting your money on an hour's
worth of bollocking:
like i told Michaela today...
you'd prefer me to stay an hour? yes...
but i want to see you more often...
how about... more 30 minute sessions than
me wasting my time, your time, within the confines
of an hour?
she agreed...

reading Ovid certainly helped...
            
now: i find this comparison slightly funny...
coming back from work this Asian colt started saying:
ooh man... now all i want to do it sleep...
tall guy, by my standards handsome...
all i want to do now it sleep...
obviously i kept me mouth shut and exploded
in a giggle only the gods could have heard...
me? oh sure, sure... sleep...
me? now all i want to do is ****...

that's the difference between me in my early 20s
and me in my mid 30s...
i want my brains left on a pavement
in a scrabble-puzzle...
      at least in the ******* you can kiss...
lips... wriggle one nose against the other...
kiss the forehead...
and as she licks her lips in ecstasy you dive back
in with our lips and tongue...
and are met with the right amount of teasing
reciprocation...
oh: if it weren't for my zenith-prime...
i look at old age with such disgust: or rather:
fear... old age stands before scarier than death
itself... it's so decrepit... when modern allowances
meet up with ancient standards...
i don't want to grow old...
there's no concept of old age when it comes
to the seasons...
a winter is never old...
an autumn is never old...
turtles are perhaps unnaturally old...
but i don't want to live a life of summaries...
without any philosophical endeavours started in youth!

i thank my momentary lapse into insanity
for my chance to peer into the mouth and ****
of Sophia... and learn a thing or two...
but i don't want to drag this life
to some rancid realisation that i could have done more...
loved more...
thanked more...

carpe ******* diem...
          the parting was the worst... we just couldn't
stop kissing each other, me and Michaela...
that's how it should be: that's how relations between
women and men ought to be like:
antithetically political...
i must want to kiss her... even thought:
she might have slept with 10 other men during
the night... it doesn't: matter...
what matters is that she slept with me...

me? i wash myself prior to *******...
she looks on...
the coldest of waters to relieve my mind from
a hot fungus "tumour" sitting in place
of my ego... i almost slip out of the bath...
she dries me up with a towel...
at least she knew to dry my forehead during my
missionary stampede so i wouldn't sweat all over her...
giggling... tender... a woman turned girly:
a beautiful sight to watch:
the tower of Pisa has done enough leaning...
i'm done with already too much learning...

it's beautiful to watch...
i can go and see any variation of beauty in an opera house...
or an art gallery...
but? a woman in a brothel is like for like
with these exponents of culture...
and? if, like her, she's Romanian...
and i'm not English... and we're ******* about in England?
all the better... all the best...
it's like we have created our very own Vatican city
out of nothing except out of tenderness for each other...

change of pace...
more kisses... i'm sorry to say: i'm not sorry
that even the bodyguard ensuring the girls of the brothel
are protected looks at me with eyes and a smile
that suggests i might be his younger brother...
hey presto! no problem here...
one lover-boy is making progress...
but man: i used to get so so angry about being 21 and going
to nightclubs and not getting laid...

now? i do a shift... i go and get laid...
i come back home... relaxed:
like a shadow without a body... about to escape into the night...
it's so pleasant seeing a woman be plesured:
it's like sitting beside  river...
contemplating a metaphor of serpents wriggling
though: they way...
or the obnoxious earth-worms...
or perhaps: watching a waterfall: demanding:
where's the sea! where's the sea!

very much in the vein of Milan Kundera's
the unbearable lightness of being...
Michaela? she likes to have her eyes closed
during *******...
me? i like to have me eyes: wide-open...
two, perfectly couple dynamics...
of *******...
it rarely works when both parties like to see...
it's teasing: necromancy...
with one one party wishing to have their eyes closed...
while the other party adamant on keeping
them open...

my god: i like having ***...
it's like petting a helpless animal
it's like the 1960s revolution reignited...
into its former splendour...
there's only one greater aspect of ***:
watching a woman get pleasured...
those little nuances: grimaces,
    irks... bothersome "somethings":
when you change pace on the summit of your own
piston... shoving...
and while you're kissing... beautiful to watch...

oh man: i felt like a man...
she kept adoring my beard: kept stroking it...
she adored my chest-hair...
kept running her hands... fingers... nails... through
the foilage...
i felt like such a man with this:
very much a woman...

to hell with English girls...
                  if they're supposedly this lucky-stab of
a Pakistani offensive:
so easily duped... no... no... i'm not going to chase
that... i'm not chasing after cheap-****!
after the easily quenched...
some ******* intelligence doesn't hurt...
i don't do automaton:
                            *****-extension robotic clad
*******... shy fake-shy types...
no!
                 nein! nein! niet!
some ******* ****-worth-of-brains... seriously...
*** is good... bad *** is: no *** at all...

       i'm not going to lament the fate of women
not of my ethnicity!
idiotic enough to not know any better:
why am i to be some *******: compensating
outlet of "compensation"?
               me? i like them primed...
readily agreeable...
***** 20 *****... but kisses one lips...
i like girls like that... in one night: mind you...

I'M NOT YOUR, *******, FATHER!
i've done my duties in what English girls have kept secret:
i'm not ******* pretend-nuns!
to hell with you if you think i'm into
******* Thespians! no!
ugh... i'm irritated from the get-go...
no! **** that... i like wholesome women...
authentic women! WOMEN! not feminised-girls...
i love women... girls don't interest me...
women? Romanian, Turkish, Russian...
Thai... that sort of brood...
these are still women... anything western is
girlish...
i liked the idea of being a woman's man
when she stroked my hairy chest and gave off a purr..
i loved how: when i told her to pull back my
******* she exclaimed with a sort of: hide & seek
exclamation of: aha! that's how it works?!

there were once men and women...
as there are now ideas of what men and women were...
i think i'm of the former category...
date? date my ***... i was fiddling my fingers:
trying to find a violin in her ***-crack and ****
while she was performing oral *** on me...
the inner-side of her thighs...
***-slapping a must...
                      
i'm sorry... what?!
                 i'll be seeing her on the 18th...
this plump plum of a body that requires kisses
on the lips and tongue on tongue and kisses on
the forehead... and all the adoration that her fat curves...
even she was surprised:
i already had a hard-on for her before she
started to suckle on it...
my god... i love the sexuality of women...
it's... so... it's... so... hybrid!
so unusual... it's so make-shift...
as much as i might:
   no... i like being a man long before any envy
concerning the sexuality arrives in me...
let women be women: and Plato, Plato...
             for the love that's readily leftover in me:
for the love of prostitutes...
all the love i could ever possibly give:
i give unto them!