the current heat-wave that has gripped England
is not doing anyone any favours...
two days running: i wake up like a turtle...
first day was great sticking to the wooden floor...
but today even listening to podcasts
became too much...
                          i woke up dry as a turtle:
then turned into a jellyfish...
    i have to admit: nights are bit more peaceful
once i managed to catch that rat...
and it was a rat... not a mouse...
                   because mousetraps didn't work
on him... the ******* cheese was gone...
  and the mousetrap...
                what was this genius rat doing?
taking the traps to where he spent the day
behind the cupboard: figuring them out?
and then coming back out during the night?
i sort of wished he would have went
for the trap with the poison cubes he could have
chewed... i really hope he would have went
for that option... instead...
            he went down the classical route...
problem being... the mousetrap guillotine didn't
break his neck...
    like back in the day the execution via hanging
seemed almost humane: provided the neck broke...
sort of like a guillotine...
   i hate it when it doesn't...
                   when it finally caught him i listened
for about ten minutes trying to wriggle out from
the trap... i took a knife and one of my cats
and... i started scratching the knife against the cupboard
holding my cat between my legs...
i was just about to open the cupboard door
when he started to fight too much...
             well? it's not like he could bite his head
off and do a runner with another mousetrap...
so i just left him like an Andrei Chikatilo...
               these are two of my favourite "urban myths":
a quote from Bane in one of the Batman movies:
or perhaps he's wondering, why someone would
shoot a man! before throwing him out of a plane...
who the hell said that a shot to the head will
**** you?
                 it sure as **** didn't **** Christine Chubbuck...
in the movie she's moved into a hospital:
sure... in a vegetative state... but alive...
brain dead so i'm guessing in LIMBO land...
but why did they take ol' Andrei the butcher...
the guy who was actually married and i'm guessing
had children... they took him into a cell...
and... shot him in the back of the head...
                          i'm guessing they did that because...
then they left him in that cell for a while...
oh... he wasn't dead for some time...
bleeding out your head? it must take some time...
that's why i never understood why people
in movies shoot themselves in the head...
so idiotic... Kafka knew all about it:
                           i too think stabbing the heart
is a more humane way to go...
         because that's when the brain shuts off last
and is not shut off first...
   imagine it like: you walk into a room
into the middle of the night - the room is lit
because someone forgot to turn the light off...
and you're there to look for something you
misplaced... and what do you do?
  you turn off the light and then start looking
for the misplaced thing...

- i mean: i'm pedantic about cleanliness...
there's some discipline in keeping a house clean...
but how did a rat manage to find its way
into my house...
               perhaps rats abhor the warmth of
Africa... but my Nigerian neighbour thought it
was a good idea to leave food around in
his garden... for his ******* love of "pigeons"...
yeah... i love pigeons too... but i'd feed
them in the park: not my ******* garden...
my cat already managed to **** about three before
one commando managed to get into my house...
vague "voodoo" practices... sorry...
sometimes when you're given a rodent problem
there's no politeness to be had...
i was rising having my washing machine /
dishwasher cables chewed through...

hell... i once petted a fox like i might have petted
a dog... for about month...
but he wasn't a rat... he used to come at a specific
time... and whatever leftover food from dinner
wasn't eaten... i'd leave a tray of it for him...
happy customer... i think i documented
it in one of my social-media albums under the name:
Brody... after that ginger actor from Homeland...
that as a fun experience... he used to walk after
me watching where i'd place the food...
and how he gobbled on it...
beside a cat... probably the next best pest deterrent...

but i've had enough... waking up tired
from the heat-wave...
               i've decided to sleep in the garden...
thank "god" my cat is still in the garden:
i left my window open when he finally decided
to come home... but... i don't blame him...
i'm too seeking out the cold...
         i don't know why some people adore themselves
and life with all this camel-jockey heat...
i hate summer... when i was a child
it was all fun and games... but as i've grown older
i have more respect for autumn and winter...

i went cycling from the hours 11:30 through to 1am...
i needed to cool off and i needed
to find some whiskey...
                      the heat also implies i prefer
liquids more than actual chew-chews...
my appetite disappears...
                            my new favourite shaky-shaky?
Greek yoghurt... some water... ice-cubes...
pumpkin seeds... sunflower seeds...
cranberries... fresh strawberries...
   it's the only "thing" that stays down...

while cycling i stopped off to buy the whiskey
and a strawberry cider:
i knew something was wrong because
my head was pulsating with a bulge that wasn't
exactly a headache...
my brain was trying to do a runner...
my jaw was stiffening...
i felt i was growing a third eye:
which usually happens when i know that
not having finished ******* = i still have to ****
some more... irritable bowels / not-exactly...

cycling in the night ought to have irritated
my ******* enough... and it did...
i'm waiting for the cooler months to rekindled
my love for eating ******...
yeah... anyways...
got home and did what was necessary...
but it took me two Sol beers with that
much appreciated lime slice...
                                  
   i hate heat-waves...
     i don't know how many rats are still roaming
the vicinity... thankfully i kept the cat
in the garden... well... being a Maine ****:
i'm sort of compassionate...
like i might be with a Huskie...
i'm going to join him in a "minute or two"...
i'm going to sleep in the garden:
to hell with the furnace of my bedroom!
but i need him to scout out for any potential
rats that might be audacious to nibble on me...

sure... a spider might crawl into my nostril
or my ear... hell... i'm not waking up in this furnace...
but this heat-wave rekindled a memory
for me... when i was younger i used to be
very much into black metal...
death metal... yada yada...
   esp. the band SATYRICON -
  sign of the trident, the wolfpack...
listening to them after so many years i'm reminded
of certain things...
nothing important...

although...
              this is important to me...
Serbian Cyrillic does use the Roman J...
A, E, K, O...

               me? i'm thinking of adding one letter
to the ****** script...
living among the English i tend to think
on lazy terms...
don't vs. do not...
                    would not vs. wouldn't...
letter eating... "cannibalising" expressions...
i heard the argument a long time ago...
the "too many vowels"...

i would introduce no real improvement...
just... particular words...
e.g.? rat... szczur...
                  i just need a Russian letter...
щur...         mein gott! it doesn't even look that bad...
because there are several words in ******
that have the щ- / szccz- prefix...
i will not touch the suffix -ść...

                i just don't want to conflate the H & Z...
i can't do anything about dość (enough)
i thought about the caron S & C...
    but... there are plenty of words that begin
with SZCH (SHCH)... in the Slavic tongue...

and... let's face it... if you already have
     dość...  you don't want ščur...
imagine if the caron prefixes and the acute suffixes
ever met in a single word:
i know the language works in its current
dictates... but i'm lazy...

                      щur:   originally:

szczerość: ščerość vs. щerość....
                                if i can make SZCZ disappear?
hell... i'd make rz disappear into ř...
                            je: suis...
                                          but still keep the ż...
just ideas... when i leave notes
to people... don't you think i don't invoke
from Cyrillic usage?!
   i can't be bothered with the SZCZ... SHCH...
there are plenty of words that could use the щ
instead...

**** me... for a black metal band...
SATYRICON are still pretty decent.