I hate it when life is going in the right direction,
Then you come back in some how.
It’s almost as if you enjoy derailing peoples lives.
I hate thinking that you would be capable of that.
This time is different,
I look at you and there’s almost nothing left.
Just the feeling of disappointment.
You use me when you’ve put yourself in that dark hole.
Once I show the love you deserve and could have,
You run back to the very thing that hurt you more than I ever could.
That’s when I realized you don’t want love,
Your own words as if you were speaking to a mirrored image of yourself;
“You just love the idea of love.”
Also how you twist things or assume them, then tell me how I do that.
Maybe I do, yet it’s ironic because I’m the sober one.
So this time,
You say this is the last straw, yet you always say that.
The cycle continues with you,
I won’t be a part of it any longer.
To quote my favorite line,
“I’m not going to stop the wheel, I’m going to break the wheel.”
You don’t get to win.
I will keep working, growing and becoming the best I can be.
The problem isn’t me, if it was then my life would be terrible everyday.
Yet it only goes south the second you come back into it.
So no more.
And when the day comes and you’re struggling again you’ll see me but you won’t know who I am.
Then again you never did.
I will build my life,
You’ll be lucky enough to see what you could’ve had.
What I wanted to build with you,
But that all went the window the second you slept with him out of spite.
The woman I choose isn’t a girl who plays games with peoples heads.
She loves with her whole heart,
Smiles the biggest smile.
Laughs like there’s no tomorrow.
I lost her twice because of you coming back into my life,
And I ran to help you everytime.
She understood even though I never could if that was me.
Now it’s her.
Because it should’ve been from the beginning.