I was never an artist,

I was the athlete-

so said my mother and sister.

This meant I ran faster,

kicked harder,

ran away but came home

only to find you

hanging that noose.

I was 9 years old

and I saw you in the dusted

garage.

I saw you standing on that

stool.

Is that what you wanted?

Were you trying to prove

a ******* thing?

Did you want nothing

to do with your

two precious daughters?

Did you want your cheating

husband to turn around

and beg for forgiveness

and tell you that he loved you?

yeah, I was 9 and

I opened that door and

saw that noose around  your neck.

I screamed ****** ******

and fell to my knees.

Please mama! No!

She cried and stepped

down.

She ran to her bedroom

and I followed screaming.

All I remember from that night

was daddy leaving us all behind

one of many times.