I want authentic honesty
the kind that cuts me open and grips me
the kind that's sinking
but also triggers hoping
for a lesson or a blessing
for a broken curse or a universal testing  
that stretches out my wings and frees me
I do not want anything that is fleeting
I want everything and I want nothing
I've got a lot to say about some things
and a lot to say about nothing
not sure if you're listening
but I want to keep talking
I want to keep this feeling
it's a sign of what makes me unsteady
losing grip of a controlled reality
but I'm too ******* busy
mostly in my brain
you never enter it the same way you came