All the elders in my life take it upon themselves to guide me to some mystical goal I apparently have.
Even my father, a man who thinks of me as just a mistake, has found it within himself to tell me what it is I'm destined for.
They all use different words and syntax and present it in their own unique way but the message is just an echo.
"You're gonna be somebody you know. With your smarts and the way you see the world, you're gonna be big. No question. You just need to take the time to sit back and really ask yourself what it is you want because lemme tell ya, you can get it what with all you got"
But I smile and nod and sometimes I even stare off into the distance as if suddenly taken by some ethereal force that will point me to the future.
In reality I couldn't care less what my elders think. Or what anyone thinks about who I'm going to be. What does it matter to you what I become? It won't be because of you.
I have no idea what I want to be. Why be anything? So many of my days are spent juggling around the idea of if I even want to be at all.
But their thoughts of me fill my head some nights and I sit here staring up into the ceiling for empty hours on end trying to see myself as they claim to.