I see:
White skin, short black hair;
The tall frame of yours walking
and walking and running
Running alongside your father…

Running inside my mind
Laps and laps around longings and memories,
While an uncertain despair sinks deep into my stomach:
The thought that…
maybe you’ll never care as much as I do.

But I still see you
Dropping on one knee on the grass,
Searching with a flashlight to show
The bright-eyed little boys the little spider I found and was now running free

I still see you
Dropping on one knee
To tie that one boy’s shoelaces,
That little namesake of yours.

This was from years ago—
But I’ll never forget, though you may have already
Small moments of you… being you:
Caring and careful…

And I eventually realized it was characteristic of you to hold the door open for me one day;
That it was nothing special, just you… being you
but I’m glad to have seen that.

And I hope you don’t decipher this because knowing that I love you may be disastrous
Because…
maybe you’ll never care as much as I do.