I am ruined.  I am ruined because I cannot speak without moving your mouth.  I am getting younger.  if my mother dies, I’ll have nowhere to go.  I wake up.  in the morning, I have one finger and use it to light the rest.  my muscles are whispers of a mass firing.  my father throws a well dressed mannequin from the fourth floor and disappears.  I wrestle it into the burning pile.  meat is scarce.  supplies a tiny church.