this had been it
the big showdown
a test of gamble
and wit
and *****
and steel
the test which separates the men from the boys
which separates the fight from the flight
so what's it going to be?

Tim called me to let me know he was outside
Tim being my Dad
my Dad who I see so much of myself in
My Dad who I haven't always said the kindest things about
he came upstairs
I let him in
I had just cleaned the apartment
he said
let's see why the school hasn't sent me a bill
I said
there is no bill to send
and there never will be
now brace yourself
the bomb will go off in 3...
2...
1....
then nothing
just acceptance
acceptance which took me aback
because I hadn't expected it
or the side of support it came with
half of a year
I spent
no
wasted
fretting over this moment
and that's all it was
a moment
nothing too special
but the weight which fell from me
made all the difference to my disposition
the time of lies is over
the time to be
the real
Harry J Baxter is here