i spend more time fearing myself and wishing I was different
than hating the person who ruined my life
i force myself to act sad so people know I'm not alright

im hurting the people who love me again
like a washing machine on rinse
i repeat

sad songs are more appealing than a full meal
i can't remember the last time i looked in the mirror and felt real

i throw around terms of diagnosis because im scared to know its real
i joke about my problems because its the only way i can feel

i spent three months completely numb and didnt really care
i lie to my therapist about how im doing because its easier staying here

my mum looks at me like a stranger
where did her little girl go

dad doesnt really speak to me
the distance will just grow

im stuck in my room, my mind, my life
im stuck with a key in my hand