i used to draw tarot for you
and i still do
sometimes
but now when i do
i feel like i'm spying
into the walls of your mind
without your awareness
having to guess on my own
which walls hold back what
i can't tell what you put there to protect you
vs what you're trying to cage and run from
you said i could still do it
even if you weren't there
to watch the cards fly
as they knock down
each and every last one of those walls
as if it were a game of dominos
i am not scared of what i may discover
i am scared of breaking something fragile that you have hidden from our sight
for your own safety
and that's why i still feel guilty
and because i know
that people knowing how you feel
is one of your greatest fears