Mar 2021
Every night i see the darkness or stars
Every night i hear the sound of the night birds
Every night i listen to my family sleep while
Every night i lie awake and alone
Every night i look at the stars instead of my lids
Every night i hear birds instead of dreaming
Every night i wish to escape
Every night i dread the next day
Every night that I don't sleep
Every night followed by a day of faking it
Every night trying to cover the dark circles
Every night trying to stay awake
Every night trying not to close my eyes
Every night dreading my subconscious mind
Every night watching my dad die
Every night though I never saw him alive
Every night watching my friends go down
Every night shot after shot
Every night i wish I could reopen my eyes
Every night i hear the sound of the night birds
Every night i listen to my family sleep while
Every night i lie awake and alone
Every night i look at the stars instead of my lids
Every night i hear birds instead of dreaming
Every night i wish to escape
Every night i dread the next day
Every night that I don't sleep
Every night followed by a day of faking it
Every night trying to cover the dark circles
Every night trying to stay awake
Every night trying not to close my eyes
Every night dreading my subconscious mind
Every night watching my dad die
Every night though I never saw him alive
Every night watching my friends go down
Every night shot after shot
Every night i wish I could reopen my eyes
I'm scared of sleeping. I see my friends get killed or commit and then they moved into each other. It sometimes feels real and I expect them to be dead when I wake up. Other time I know it's a dream but I can't force myself awake. I long for a night of uninterrupted sleep but I also would rather stay awake. Sleeping pills make it worse they just make it harder to escape.
