The whole condo is full of Doritos.
It smells like a dentist's office, only
without any pretense of dentistry.
All assumptions aside, I plug my nose.
Crunching under my feet, the cheese meadows
spread the carpet's sprawl. Who'd live in this place?
I compose myself, set my briefcase
down, crunch through the living room. Who knows?

  This is ******* gross. Out of these condos
  this one's the very worst. A baby's cry
  emanates through this urban pigsty.
  I peer into a room and...baby toes? --
  baby toes! -- peeking from mounds of crushed cheese!
  *Why do these crack heads keep having babies?