Why do you leave? You always leave. You see inside of me and it is as if you become fearful of me. As if you did not come with me. But you said no matter what you’d always care. Do you? Do you still care? Do care that I sit here now wondering? Because trust me I wonder. I wonder if it was my fault. I wonder if you miss me like I miss you, I wonder. And I will never stop. Our time together was short, but I loved it. I became attached to it soon, like always. But I can't believe that I met you and felt like I didn’t have to hide. I felt I could be me. I told you how rare it was for me to feel that but you still left. You barely gave me a reason and you left. You walked out like everyone. I hate myself for caring but I don’t think I can not. I told you who I really was. I did things with you that I haven’t done in a long time. I show you things that I hadn’t trusted anyone with in so long. That so many other forces on me and took from me. I gave it to you willingly. And you still leave. Maybe I do ruin everything. But you will just become another reason why people will never know me. You are part of the reason I fear opening up. Because I pour out my heart and soul to people and they always leave. Vanishing as if time together meant nothing to them. But what none of them get, what you did not get, is that our time together meant the world to me. For you made me laugh when I felt dead inside. You stop my tears from pouring out. You were the person I picked the phone and called when I felt like the world was crushing me. When I wanted to take a gun and blow my brains out. And you were there then. Is that why you left? You left but so does everyone else. So at this point it must be me? I am the reason everything vanished out of my life. I am too much for anyone to deal with. But I don’t know how to fix myself so I will keep losing everyone. And will hide my pain from everyone including my family in fear of losing them too.