as i fall asleep, i want to cry, for i felt a part of something tonight
my guts weren't aching and i didn't feel myself wanting to leave the room
i wasn't yearning
i wasn't waiting for something to go wrong

for one day i didn't feel like i was sinking into the ground, i sat at the table and i let myself laugh so loud
i felt a part of the earth spinning, flowers blooming and morning birds singing, i didn't dread going to sleep because i wanted to be awake as long as time would let me
it didn't feel like nobody needed me - it felt like i could finally be free

and although i lay in my bed terrified of time, i want every part of me to remember tonight
standing under the void of a sky blowing cold air as if it was smoke
the bliss of not wondering if i was embarrassing
the comforting touch of the winter air's sting
i will my all to have hope from this