It means that I am no longer loved by that person,
Only hated no matter how hard I try.
I am not even thought of at all by that person.
And that I am expected to take care of everything,
Without any help not even a thank you.
It means if I defend myself in anyway
I will always be wrong,
I will always be the bad guy.
It means I no longer matter
And only exisist for finances or to be stolen from or used.
It means as long as my loved one is on it,
I will be there punching bag.
I'll be degraded, belittled, tore down
And reminded of every mistake I ever made.
Humiliated til there's nothing left of my self esteem...
It means I get to watch my handsome, talented, kind son
Turn into a monster at times.
And it means I have to watch him wilt,
While it slowly kills him,
And eventually he will die.
****** is a cold, decieving, serial killer.
First killing your heart,
Making you dead inside.
Yes many physically die,
But the greatest loss
Is how it kills your conscience,
Your morals, your values, your common sense.
And breaks down everyone around you.
Til they are dead inside too.
This is how ****** has effected me.
I truly believe that ****** is satan himself.
And It feels like God is just standing by,
Watching us like we are etertainment,
Doing nothing to stop it.
  Not even batting an eye....

           L. Mack

                12/16/2020