Sometimes I feel like people are trying to pacify me, with a pacifier, when I'm actually throwing up. But they don't see it. They literally do not see it. And then they get mad at me for refusing to take the pacifier when it really isn't helping at all, in fact, it's making it worse. You don't help people when you're not helping them. When someone is throwing up, you don't give them something that will keep it in. You help them throw up, you help them get that yucky stuff out of them, you get a towel, or a bowl, or take them to a toilet. You rub their back, get them some tea, wash their face. It's not pretty and it's not fun, but it's helping. Pacifiers are quick and easy and take little to no effort on your part. But when someone is throwing up, that takes patience, endurance, love, empathy, sacrifice, kindness, determination. If you can't help, don't try to help at all, it may make it worse.
I am not talking about service here, I am and I'm not. I'm talking about when someone is in a real problem, and they need the right help; if you can't give that right help, don't give the wrong help. When someone is throwing up, don't give them a pacifier.