my body is compressed by the concrete of my thoughts being poured over me
im restricted from movement
im restricted from stopping
im in over my head and i don’t know how to stop it
i don’t know how to deal with it

the hardening cement is so thick but it still manages to seep into my skin
i can’t get up in the morning
it’s so hard
the cold concrete soaks the cones in my retinas
i am tired of seeing the same thing
the same gray
everywhere
why are you everywhere.

im turning into stone and it’s your fault
im falling apart because i couldn’t stop you from your own sabotage
im crumbling into dust because your faults turned to mine

the strings in my head strum at the thought of you
i hate you
no i don’t, i still love you.
i know it’s pathetic
you’ve taken over my thought process
you slow me down
i feel like i’m suffocating
please get out of my head
i don’t want to turn to stone just because of you
it’s always you.

cement under my finger nails
im trying to get out i really am but i’m running out of strength
my thought process is foggy and slow
it’s the same reminiscent gray that reminds me of you
i hate you.
but not literally
unfortunately.