Masturbatory poetry doesn't get anyone else off
Doesn't lead to pregnancy or abortion
Isn't about love or deep human emotions;
It's rather mechanical, and can go on for a long time-
Rather pointlessly,
And it's embarrassing
To be caught indulging in it, needlessly
When you've already done five pieces today
Maybe you should just give that hand a rest?
Masturbatory poetry can cause quite a mess.