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Nov 2020
I sit an wonder why,
These late mornings I just want to cry,
If I could just swallow my pride, stop all the lies maybe I'd stop feeling like I'm dying inside.
Every mistake I make, could be the last breath I take, I put on a smile but it's all ******* fake
I see you looking at me, judging me, through
All the lies all the hurt all the pain I caused to you
But it's my life it's my hell it's nothing you can do. what I want, I do, what I do, the drugs got a hold of me not of you
I wanted to stop I wanted to go away I wish that one day I'll never feel this pain just please make it go away
Rolling in the truck through the mountains and hills not worried about paying my ******* bills I got to find the next drug I need to find the next pills before I find my life is over because it kills
What do you say to that, what do you think I should do. how should I react should I pretend to be you,
But I'm not you I am me,  fighting these demons, wanting to be free. I got no life, I got no hopes all I know is I keep banging this dope.
I see it now I see it clear nothing to show but the end game is near, no more hoops no more dreams no more looking in the mirror no more you seeing me because I'm gone because I'm dead because I let the dope go raking In my head
Feeling so weak feeling so tired feeling like a hopeless useless  selfish ******* no one admires
I'm done I'm out nothing more to say this life if I wouldn't have changed would have definitely gone this way
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