keep fighting. the dark doesn't last forever. i promise.


i was not supposed to be here last year.
tIme Was supposed to remove me from this plAne by my own hand and yet i am here, Still here.
half of me is in deep greyS and cannot tUrn their neck to look uP at the little bit of colour acquired since, seePing dOwn from the other half of me.
i am very tired and while i wish to Sleep, thEre are things that i Do not wanT waiting fOr me lest i Do not wake up agaIn.
for if i rEst for my final time, i would tear a hOle through uNiverses nonE have heard of, black holes that will never evaporate, regardless of if i can wrap my head around the possibilitY that i am wanted.
one yEar lAter and my head buRns with memories i do not hAve anymore, locked behind walls sturdier than steel that i forbade myself from ever Going tO take down.
whether it be Involuntary or A juMp to arms, tHere is no looking ovEr it, theRe is no picking thE lock, there is no keY tO be foUnd, there is no secret door other than a gate in the middle.
there is shAde with a cushion that the dooR providEs for me.
wiTh shade cOmes peace and with peace cOmes healIng. time weArs down everything, no Matter what the subject may be.
the door's hold has been disruPted and flames have begun to gRow and surrOund the wall, bUrning it up.
with each new cinDer, mOre seeps out From behind a Year's wOrth of sUrvival.

i do not know how long i have been on survival throughout my life, but i do know one thing.

it gets better, friend. it is increasingly difficult for me, but it may not be with you. keep fighting. the dark doesn't last forever. i promise.