Never have two words uttered hurt me more Than when I heard them say, "bless you" Words that held me more than I deserved Whispering in my ear with spurn and commune
When I was raised I came face to face With another whose life was balled and chained To bright eyeliner, dark stockings, and lace lingerie And when I saw what was lost, I lost what was gained
As a youth I ate captain crunch and played tunes In the mornings and in the evenings on TV I would eat fruit loops and see you on the news As you held my family hostage while smiling
Still you uttered to me many blessings Still you would hold onto me and start to sing As my mother did my ***** laundry And I snuck into her purse for money
When I knew she was fighting everyday To provide for my brother and me But you dwelled within my ways So it didn't matter if we had electricity
And I held all of that power When I had once begun to scour For freedom of several hours That came from drugs and wet towels
Wet towels from *** with a girl unnamed The same girl who was held by ball and chain To bright eyeliner, dark stockings, and lace lingerie And when I saw what she lost, I lost what was gained
So I started searching for a new free It wasn't in my drugs or mamas money It wasn't in that girls love or on the TV So I searched for the clarity in me
Trying to recall the truth, behind "bless you" Why would you bless this sinful youth I suppose at some point I was expected to Rise up above you in order to bless you too
In this new found reality I saw where the angels weep I found your book flowing On the love inside of me
It contained your initials of B.B. It gained my tears that would bleed Through each and every sheet Of your words and your beauty
Your thoughts and your dreams Were simply hiding and hoping, Waiting on me
To spread my wings and be free
To remember the beauty in the fruit loops, the drugs, and the laundry
To remember the beauty in the girls eyeliner and in the electricity