Someone I use to say I love
Someone I use to say I wanna be
But now I look at it with eyes with blades
I use to blame u for the reason that I quit
On happiness and the only thing that made me
Now I locked myself up
Not one tear every leaves
Now my hatred for you is as hard as my fist
Now I wish how u would leave
Bc at least then I hope I'll see straight
Hopefully be happy another day
Abuse of alcohol and drugs
Trying to pick 18 year olds when you're 40
Only thinking of himself
And I think
I wanted to be like this
Be a drug addict who abuses alcohol
And try's to get girls my age
Divided by 2
Now I realize I was blinded and that won't happen again
Keep my back against the wall and slugging fools
Not thinking about walking bc once I do
Well then someone can come up from behind and end me there
And whenever I look in a mirror I wanna scream
Disgusted by what I see
I can't believe it
He very thing I despise if become
**** how could this happen
Disappointed suicide seems like an option
Wait till alone
Grabs a knife
And goes to cut
Stops and breaks down crying
Alone