These are the nights
Lonely
Longing
These are the nights that I try to avoid
By entertaining guests that are far from appealing
By watching television as to fill my mind with nonense
By consuming large amounts of food so that I can think about how bad my stomach hurts rather than my thoughts
These are the nights that force me to keep the lights on
Because my demons come out in the dark
The lights still seem 20 times dimmer and yet 80 times lighter
These are the nights that I write
Because I must display my thoughts
Anywhere but inside my head
Because in my head it's all real,
But on paper, or a screen
It's more serene
Like morphine it numbs me
We say we would rather feel pain than numbness
But numbness is what we crave when we have stomach pains or headaches
I despise these nights