I’m not sure if you remember
The crowds, actions
Or even the stars…or anything for that matter
We haven’t talked in over four years
And here you are in this brilliant white room
In that blue gown
Tubes hooked up this way and that
With dripping fluid flowing down
The machines giving off that annoying ring
You in some state of sleep
Maybe not to wake
I stand taking in your appearance
For the first time in a while
The last time I saw you
You mixed and blended in
But your eyes found mine
For the briefest time
Taking a deep breath, I clear my head
Walk over
Sit down and really begin
The doctors say all these words, phrases
And I pick up on a few
The key ones at least
We don’t know….
He might not….
His condition is….
Vitals show….
Results came in….
And then there was this one word
That seeped in above the rest
Stable
I think there was a for now in there too
But once I heard that word
I didn't hear much else after that
And I don’t know why I came
I don’t know what to say
My mind is so blank
The words gone
My eyes train on your face
Rough and bruised
Wrapped and bandaged
Okay, um, I think….
I think should stop thinking
It’s becoming really troubling
I want to tell you something
And it’s horrible that you’re in this condition
But I don’t think I could tell you any other way
Because if I saw your eyes
Looking at me in that way
That way that makes me forget everything…..
Okay….you…..you
You gave me something
And took away something
Without knowing it
You probably don’t ever think about this
But I do
We were at this game
It was so crowded
So many people
Cheering and shouting
And disbelief and relief and excitement
Flooded through the stadium
Everyone was so into the game
There came this small moment
Where we must have glanced at each other
But we locked eyes
And before I knew what was happening
You reached over and tucked a stray piece of my hair
Behind my ear
You’re excuse was adorable
You said, you had a curl
What was even better
There was someone sitting between us
But that night afterwards under stars
Clearing and heading out
A part of us changed
We had this secret almost
That no one knew about
But it was ours
Even we didn't understand it
We were young but it was there
An intense feeling
At least on my end
After years sometimes I still feel it
Unexpected
You took that from me
A part of me
In that year
You took a piece of me
You made me feel
Feelings, sensations unaccustomed to
You still do, even after all this time
But I gave it to you unknowingly so
I wish you knew
I wish you could understand
Right now, the implication of what I’m trying to say
To tell you
Why I came, because I do know
I deny myself knowing
Because it is too much
But I had to tell you
At least once
I know you might not wake anytime soon
But I hope that you do
Because I would want to tell you again
Even if you don’t remember the next day
Or hour or minute after I’m done
The fact that you heard it
Understood it for the briefest time
Is enough
For me, it’s enough
So yeah, I think that’s it
I’ll come back though
……yeah……I’ll come back
I rise up, unsteady and almost baffled
But I lean over and place a kiss on your forehead
Then I remember one more thing I wanted to say
So I whisper in your ear
Those three words
That I've waited so long to say
That I've endured for so long
And then I back away
And leave
But I’ll come back
Yeah, I’ll come back