(summarily iterated June 30th, 2020)

I share the following lines
with utmost delight
courtesy 20/20 hindsight
June twenty ninth
two thousand and twenty

corrigible, fallible,
and intelligible light
hearted fella (aging
baby boomer) usually polite
doth not trend toward
superficial nor trite.

Ostrich with wordplay
(mine metaphorical putty) enjoys
shape shifting rules
of English language
never knowing literary
endeavor (mine) outcome
unpredictable as wind
doth form sand dune
farfetch'd physique

peculiarly genetically hewn
no avian expert, yet
sports wide whirled
webbed analogous to loon
yours truly at heart,
an honest to dog poltroon
acquired pipes, whereat
ofttimes I sing out of tune.

No idea when predilection arose
to toy with said mother tongue
frequently buzzfeeding me passion
I rend toward proclivity
maketh anonymous reader to doze
gibberish spews gobbledygook
gushing out imaginary hose
frequently diverging off course

pertaining to poem title
which (reading between
the roaring lines) here
sought to delineate highs and lows
regarding squandered (particularly
linkedin with female)
friendship opportunities aye sip pose
jangling this beau zoe
from head to his toes.

I don't mean to engender pity
excruciatingly socially withdrawn
garnered alienation since birth
regarding human bonds, which dearth
all thru these three score years

athwart planet (unfit) ness Earth
pregnant around equatorial girth
found yours truly figuratively
tied to mother's apron string
I always felt safe and secure,

within home and hearth
even when Scottish welcome matt
yanked away by those who begot me,
now in retrospect ability
to muster mirth

within savage dime
a dozen verbal lashings
(courtesy mama and papa,
deceased and declining nonagenarian respectfully
ironically distills their overlooked worth.

Shying eye contact, I vaguely recollect
Matthew Scott Harris
as wee lad did disappoint
way back during second grade lunch
at Eagleville Elementary School,
a pretty girl christened Renee
(if memory serves me correctly)
induced writhing and foaming

incoherent sounds of silence
indubitably witnessed yours truly
an extremely shy boy
hiding behind makeshift barrier
(possibly tartan patterned lunchbox)
to avoid at all costs
painful penetrating piercing
inducing me to look askance.

As an extremely shy kid
(lacking benefit of powdermilk biscuits)
even briefest eye contact with lovely lass
sent extreme agitation
coursing thru measly frame
wreaking emotional/psychological distress

(visit repeated aforementioned
refrain ad nauseum)
recurring without letup
boyhood to young adulthood,
when within close proximity
attractive gal froze mine functionality
even with intent to exchange passing "hello."

Fast forward to recent past
i.e. namely second half of bleak existence
angst oozed and profusely did bleed,
when ability to bolster daring deed
communicating amorousness awkwardly freed
potential foolishness or embarrassment,
I shushed inner voice of amplified reason,
side stepping preservation,

aye did not heed
boot blurted out juvenile
barenaked lady desires indeed
spelling repugnance and
instant ruination against fulfilling
hormonal secretion need
wanting to escape utter fool hardiness
beating retreat (tail between legs)
ruffly with hasty dog speed!